greatlightother: (you hurt my feelings)
Svetlana Nazarova ([personal profile] greatlightother) wrote2011-06-14 04:08 pm

-97-

[Friends Filter- minus Angelica. Honestly, if you think you're here, you are. If you're not sure, ask.]

I need a distr- change. Just something small. Something that maybe no one but me will ever notice, even. I'm going to paint my room and, I suppose I could just ask the Admiral to do it for me, but no. I want to do this without his interference.

I'd like it if anyone would be willing to help, though!

[Infirmary Filter]

Does anyone have any experience with pseudocyesis? [She is just stubbornly hoping she's right.]

[Private to Petronilla]

I need your help tomorrow morning. It won't take long, I promise.

[Spam for Angelica]

[Sveta had been worried for Angelica. But, unfortunately, by the time she was able to get to what Iago had said, it had already been taken down and Sveta could do nothing more than hope the aftermath wasn't as ugly as she anticipated.

...it seemed that hope had been completely dashed. So, as soon as she had a spare moment, she rushed off to find her friend, knocking at the door rather apprehensively.] Angelica. It's Sveta...

Re: private

[identity profile] greatlightother.livejournal.com 2011-06-14 11:36 pm (UTC)(link)
No. Not with so many unknowns.

Re: private

[identity profile] deepdowndark.livejournal.com 2011-06-14 11:39 pm (UTC)(link)
Isn't one less a little better?

Re: private

[identity profile] greatlightother.livejournal.com 2011-06-14 11:56 pm (UTC)(link)
No. I'd rather just live out my life and take it as it comes. If I was a normal human, I might live to be eighty. I might live to be a hundred. I might only live to be forty or fifty.

And it never really bothered me before.

Re: private

[identity profile] deepdowndark.livejournal.com 2011-06-15 12:00 am (UTC)(link)
But the difference between eighty and forty is quite small. Between a hundred and four is huge. Between a hundred and nine hundred - which is about the oldest age a Dwarf can manage - is massive.

Re: private

[identity profile] greatlightother.livejournal.com 2011-06-15 12:02 am (UTC)(link)
It's small for you. For me, it's huge. Because I still think like a normal human.

Re: private

[identity profile] deepdowndark.livejournal.com 2011-06-15 12:05 am (UTC)(link)
True enough.

I'm only saying that I would have lived my life vastly differently if I only lived a hundred years at most.

Re: private

[identity profile] greatlightother.livejournal.com 2011-06-15 12:08 am (UTC)(link)
I'm going to live my life like I only have a hundred. And if I get another hundred, then I can do everything else.

Re: private

[identity profile] deepdowndark.livejournal.com 2011-06-15 12:16 am (UTC)(link)
Perhaps it's different in reverse.

Re: private

[identity profile] greatlightother.livejournal.com 2011-06-15 12:18 am (UTC)(link)
Perhaps.

Or maybe I just want to have a normal, human life again.

Re: private

[identity profile] deepdowndark.livejournal.com 2011-06-15 12:25 am (UTC)(link)
Then why are you here, of all places?

Re: private

[identity profile] greatlightother.livejournal.com 2011-06-15 12:29 am (UTC)(link)
I came at first because I wanted to help. And I wanted to stop the war. Now, my deal has changed.

And I'm here to hopefully get that life.

Re: private

[identity profile] deepdowndark.livejournal.com 2011-06-15 12:37 am (UTC)(link)
Do you think you have?

Do you think you will?

Re: private

[identity profile] greatlightother.livejournal.com 2011-06-15 12:42 am (UTC)(link)
My main goal has always been to help my inmate. Whatever happens after that is...really of little consequence. I'm not sure what I'm going to do with a normal life, but I want it.

Re: private

[identity profile] deepdowndark.livejournal.com 2011-06-15 12:44 am (UTC)(link)
...I still don't understand why you do.

Re: private

[identity profile] greatlightother.livejournal.com 2011-06-15 01:03 am (UTC)(link)
Because I know the alternative.

Re: private

[identity profile] deepdowndark.livejournal.com 2011-06-15 07:52 am (UTC)(link)
...and they're the only ones?

Re: private

[identity profile] greatlightother.livejournal.com 2011-06-15 11:27 am (UTC)(link)
Well, probably not. But the only ones I've seen.

Re: private

[identity profile] deepdowndark.livejournal.com 2011-06-15 06:31 pm (UTC)(link)
Why avoid a war at such length? There is glory, and history in fighting for something.

Re: private

[identity profile] greatlightother.livejournal.com 2011-06-15 06:50 pm (UTC)(link)
Because I'm being forced to fight for something I don't really believe in. They call it a choice, but it's no choice at all.

They just want to use me.

Re: private

[identity profile] greatlightother.livejournal.com 2011-06-15 06:58 pm (UTC)(link)
To restore balance to the Light and Darkness. Or rather, to keep the Darkness from winning out.

But they've let the Darkness get too powerful. They have so many rules, so many unfair rules, that they can't really see what's good anymore.

Re: private

[identity profile] deepdowndark.livejournal.com 2011-06-15 09:37 pm (UTC)(link)
Laws are always there for a reason, and immutable.

Re: private

[identity profile] greatlightother.livejournal.com 2011-06-15 09:43 pm (UTC)(link)
But they're not the same in every universe.

Re: private

[identity profile] greatlightother.livejournal.com 2011-06-15 10:47 pm (UTC)(link)
Not if I go somewhere else. Where those laws don't exist. Where I don't have to worry about the balance. And the Truce. Where I can just do what is right, regardless of anything else.

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